Do you ever find yourself in a cycle of wanting to do something healthy for yourself, committing to do it, falling short of your ideals, beating yourself up for not following through, and then repeating the whole thing? If you have, you’re not alone! This is a fairly common story for many people.
Oftentimes we double down. We think that if we can just be mean enough, we will motivate ourselves to the goal! If I can hate my body enough, I will rise to the challenge of transforming it into something I can love! If I shame myself for not going to yoga, then I will be motivated to go regularly! We berate ourselves for not following through, call ourselves weak willed, loser, and lazy, heaping all sorts of negative energy onto the self.
It may sound crazy, but humans do this ALL the time!
Shame is not a great motivator. Shame is heavy, and miserable to carry. Anyone would feel depressed and unmotivated under its weight. Then when it’s time to follow through with our intentions, we feel unmotivated by our own reinforced thoughts.
So how do we break the cycle so we finally do the thing(s) we want to do?
We break the cycle by learning what Life University is teaching. The assignments on our soul’s syllabus are delivered repeatedly until we integrate the lesson. We may feel life is slamming us with repeated failures if we don’t recognize the pattern, and look for the teaching.
Life is not trying to teach us that we suck, and never do what we say we will. Life is asking us to be kind to ourselves even when we perceive that we have come up short.
What if Life makes us feel like not following through, so we have the opportunity to not beat ourselves up? What if the lesson is to love ourselves anyway?
What if I just decide not to go to yoga, and enjoy an uplifting morning in the sunshine in my garden? What if I choose not to follow through, and love myself anyway?
Love anyway. Life is asking us to love anyway. When we fall short of our own intentions, we can love ourselves anyway! When others fall short of our hopes or expectations, we can love them anyway.
When our next opportunity arises to berate ourselves, I hope we remember to love anyway. But it’s alright if we don’t! We will get it next time Life lovingly brings us back to another opportunity to learn. Or the next.
Wishing you opportunities to love anyway!